Wisom on Marriage

Marriage requires a man to prepare 5 types of "RINGS":
a) The Engagement Ring
b) The Wedding Ring
c) The SuffeRing
d) The EnduRing
e) The TortuRing
    I never knew what real happiness was until I got married and
    by then, it was too late.

The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing -
and then they marry him.

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

Courtship - A man pursuing a woman until she catches him

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say,
talk in your sleep.

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months -- I don't like to interrupt her.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves.
After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent.

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

Marriages are made in heaven.
But so again, are thunder and lightning.

A man is not complete until he is married -- then he is finished.

Marriage is the sole cause of divorce.

A husband is living proof that a wife can take a joke.

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have;
the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.